


Acquainted (to say that we're in love is dangerous)

by Misschacilops



Category: Glee
Genre: Cheating, F/F, Friends With Benefits, Secret Relationship, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-22
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:20:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 18,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26585764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Misschacilops/pseuds/Misschacilops
Summary: It all started with a strawberry slushie.It all ended with her underwear in Quinn's hands.Faberry Enemies to Friends with benefits to Idiots to Lovers
Relationships: Rachel Berry/Quinn Fabray
Comments: 60
Kudos: 336





	1. High school

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys!  
> Welcome to my second faberry fic!  
> I'm so glad you liked "Abstinence" and here we are with a new story :)  
> As always, let me know what you think about it and if you want a second chapter.  
> English isn't my first language, so pls , forgive my lexical and grammatical mistakes.  
> See you soon :)
> 
> P.S. I'm @_weirdwriter on twitter

Rachel knew that day would have been in the top 10 of the most embarrassing moments of her life.

It was one of those secrets she would have taken to her grave, something to hide from the paparazzi and the journalists on Broadway.

Azimio and Karofsky had thrown her a strawberry slushie while she was getting her books out of her locker. Rachel cursed herself because she had no spare clothes that day, except for the cardigan she had chosen to take off at the first hour because it was hot.

_How lucky._

So she tried to save what could have been saved.

The hair was sticky and wet, the white blouse was colored in strawberry, the bra was stained and wet but wearable, the black skirt was sticky but no stains were visible.

But her underwear...

The underwear was ruined, unsavable.

She had tried to walk but an unpleasant situation between her legs made her uncomfortable.

_'At least it's the last hour.'_

She thought before going to the bathroom and doing the craziest thing she never thought she could have been able to do that day: she took off her soaked panties and put them in her bag. Startled with fear as two cheerleaders walked into the bathroom, she didn't bother closing her backpack.

It was moments later, when she walked to the Glee classroom, that her life would have been turned upside down.

Rachel sat down on the chair, making sure she covered her legs appropriately. At that moment she cursed herself for always wanting to wear such short skirts.

Mr.Schuester started talking about the weekly assignment but Rachel couldn't wait for the torture to end.

She felt humiliated and embarrassed.

Rachel was only distracted when Quinn made her triumphal entry into the Glee classroom.

Always perfect, with the ponytail at the right height, the tidy Cheerio uniform, and the charming smile that allowed her everything.

"I’m sorry I’m late, Mr. Schue." The girl said cordially. "I had an unexpected situation to solve, I hope I haven't missed much," Quinn said and Rachel was surprised to see the blonde staring at her.

"Don't worry, Quinn." Schuester told her, signaling her to sit down.

"So, Rachel, why don't you go to the board and write down the songs for the Regionals?" Schuester asked her and Rachel wanted to bury herself.

Her intention was to sit for an hour, legs closed, sealed, while the time would have passed between a song and a fight.

Rachel fake smiled and nodded. When she got up, she made sure to fix her short skirt and took the marker, walking to the board.

She tried to move slowly, small movements, measured, not excessive, to prevent the skirt from revealing her intimate details, and, every time she looked up, a pair of hazel eyes were always fixed on her legs.

She began to sweat cold, the fear of being caught was starting to get more insistent and Quinn wasn't helping.

While the others seemed to be oblivious, indifferent to her discomfort, Quinn didn’t take her eyes off Rachel.

And if she initially thought it was some intimidating act, Rachel was starting to change her mind, thinking about the worst.

Glee time ended and as she waited for everyone to leave the classroom, Rachel turned to clean everything she had written on the board.

She sighed in relief when the voices of her friends seemed distant but that relief ended when she heard the door close, it was locked.

She whirled around and realized she was screwed because Quinn Fabray was looking at her like a lion that has just captured its prey, like the wolf ready to eat the lamb and Rachel was not ready.

"Ca-can I help you, Quinn?" Rachel stammered as she watched Quinn approach her, arms crossed.

"Actually, yes. I have to ask you something and I want you to be completely honest." Quinn told her, now more than invading her personal space.

Rachel nodded because she couldn't do anything else.

"I need to know if you're naked down there," Quinn asked looking at her intently and Rachel became pale.

"What?”

It seemed like no air was circulating in her lungs as Quinn moved closer, Rachel backed away and found herself between the wall and Quinn, with no way out.

"Yes or no, Berry. It's not that hard to understand. But I have something that can help you answer." Quinn told her, pulling a pair of black underwear- that Rachel knew very well- out of her uniform pocket.

"Where did you find it?" Rachel asked alarmed.

Did Quinn rummage through her stuff?

"My girls found it in the bathroom, they say it belongs to you," Quinn explained. "Yes or no, Berry?"

_No._

_No._

_Do. Not. Answer._

_It will be your end._

_She will surely think of a way to ruin your life._

"I'm not trying to do anything, not what you think," Quinn told her, placing her hand on the wall, making Rachel feel even more trapped.

Rachel's eyes widened, trying to make sense of the girl's words.

"I want to know," Quinn said looking into her eyes, an intimacy they had never had before.

"Why?" Rachel managed to whisper.

Why?

_Seriously?_

"Because the very thought has been tormenting me for two hours. It makes me want things I shouldn't want." Quinn whispered and Rachel felt a pang between her legs.

_What was going on?_

Her father had always told her curiosity killed the cat, satisfaction brought him back.

Rachel knew she was putting herself in a dangerous situation. Quinn Fabray had only caused her problems but Rachel was desperate. She was desperate to know what was bothering Quinn because she had never seen such a grim look on the girl's face.

"What are you thinking about?" Rachel stammered.

Her nervous system went haywire, her mouth and brain weren't connected, and Rachel was afraid of her thoughts.

"I’m thinking about you and what's under this skirt," Quinn said, lightly touching her legs with her fingertips and Rachel gasped.

All that was inappropriate.

Inappropriate and unexpected.

"What I'd like to do," Quinn said, climbing higher and higher. "Your taste."

Rachel was barely breathing.

She didn't know what was going to happen but Quinn Fabray had just confessed she had fantasies about her and her body responded without even being able to control it.

"Quinn, I swear If this is a joke ..." Rachel started to say but Quinn cut her off.

"It’s not."

Rachel's eyes widened when she saw Quinn kneeling.

"Let me prove it to you."

Rachel didn't know if it was more exciting knowing Quinn had fantasies about her- she kept her panties in her uniform for two hours-, or seeing her knelt between her legs.

"Yes." She said sharply, signing her death warrant and it was all Quinn needed to lift her skirt and grab her hips.

Rachel felt her lungs heavy and her breath quick as Quinn looked at her like a lion looking at its prey.

She leaned completely against the wall and legs trembled with anticipation.

“Oh my God.” Rachel moaned when Quinn’s mouth was finally on her, licking up her entire length.

The back of her head hit the wall while Quinn slid her tongue up, focusing on the clit. Rachel seriously tried not to grab Quinn and push her mouth closer to her while her tongue swirled over the sensitive bundle of nerves and then pushed inside; Quinn’s hum of appreciation vibrated through her entire body as her tongue thrust into her wet heat.

Quinn’s hands tightened her hips, pushing her against her mouth, making her knees shake.

The alternated hard and deep licks, Quinn’s hand squeezing her ass made Rachel gasp for breath. Rachel couldn’t look away, Quinn was dedicated and demanding, claiming her pleasure.

The unfamiliar feeling was invading her low stomach, her hands desperately tried to grab something to hold because she was afraid of touching Quinn. She didn’t want Quinn to stop whatever magic she was doing to her body.

“Quinn, OH-“ She shouted as lips wrapped her clit and sucked roughly, hands squeezing her ass fiercely.

Quinn traced the outer edges, dripping with Rachel’s pleasure and then she cleaned the inner thighs with slowly and sinful licks; she stopped only when she felt Rachel collapse against the wall, her hands tight on Rachel’s hips not letting the brunette fall down. Then Quinn ghosted her lips against Rachel one more time before fixing Rachel’s skirt back into place and standing up.

Rachel was breathless but Quinn was not far behind, her face flushed and the light of her hazel eyes showed how much she enjoyed whatever they had done.

“Quinn,” Rachel whispered while Quinn took something from the ground and stood up again, looking at her eyes and stroked her naked skin.

“Mine.”  
Rachel didn’t know if Quinn was talking about her underwear or her body but she couldn’t stop the pleasure, not even when Quinn walked out of the room.

The second time was definitely a surprise.

Rachel had gone to the bathroom before lunch, after the Spanish class.

She had to meet Kurt to hear her friend's outbursts about his troubled relationship with Blaine.

Rachel hadn't said anything to Kurt; she had freaked out all afternoon in solitude, probably because she thought she had imagined everything, even though her legs were still shaking.

The world stopped when she saw the girl who had tormented her night opening the door and walking into the bathroom.

Rachel felt a chill run down her spine, their eyes met through the mirror but she fixed her hair as if Quinn's presence didn't bother her in the least.

Quinn leaned against the door and looked at her with her arms crossed.

"This skirt looks perfect on you," Quinn said with a smirk and Rachel took a deep breath, smoothing her hair, not saying a word. She heard Quinn close the bathroom door and come dangerously close to her.

"Every time you lock a door, there's always something going on,” Rachel whispered, not turning around and staring at Quinn through the mirror.

Quinn slightly tackled her against the sink, Rachel could feel the warmth of her body without even touching her.

"You didn't seem to mind yesterday," Quinn whispered in her ear and Rachel hated that she was completely right.

Silence is equivalent to assent.

“And you know what? I don't mind either, even though I barely slept last night because of you." Quinn confessed in a whisper and Rachel whirled around, looking into her eyes, because she knew the same thing had happened to her.

She had barely slept and had skipped her morning routine.

"I could still taste you on my tongue," Quinn said with black eyes full of desire and Rachel bit her lip. "I want to hear you again," Quinn told her, starting to stroke her leg intentionally and purposefully. Rachel knew her panties would have been unsavable again but for other reasons this time.

But she craved Quinn's attention again, she could come at the thought of Quinn Fabray knelt just for her.

"Do it." Rachel said to her, hearing those words come out of her mouth before she could think about it and sound less desperate. But the truth was she was really desperate.

Quinn hardly seemed to believe her but her eyes lit up and she wasted no time; before Rachel knew it, she found herself sitting on the sink and Quinn was lifting her blue skirt.

Rachel put her hands on the edge of the sink to hold on, to hold on to that vision because it was all too much.

Quinn’s tongue was deep inside her, her name came out of her trembling mouth while the right hand squeezed her ass – Rachel could tell Quinn particularly enjoyed that part of her body- and the left hand deathly gripped her inner thigh, keeping her spread before her mouth.

The second orgasm of her life was massive, a giant wave, and her heart stopped when Quinn stood up, licking her own lips, cleaning the corners of her mouth as if she had just eaten a full course meal after long fasting.

“See you tomorrow, Berry,” Quinn said to her, walking out of the bathroom.

Rachel wasn’t even able to say a word; she quickly fixed her skirt but something was definitely off.

Quinn stole her underwear.

Again.

The sixth time was _fucking_ fantastic and it represented everybody’s fantasies.

A quickie in the Cheerios locker room.

Quinn had definitely become more enterprising and passionate and Rachel was out of breath but fully satisfied with the five orgasms that the cheerleader gave her daily, between the end of her practice and the Glee.

Having Quinn Fabray knelt between her legs in the Cheerios locker room was definitely a life goal Rachel didn't know she had on her list.

Rachel was loud and desperate because Quinn was quick and fierce, every touch of her tongue was precise and fast.

Quinn looked at her - Quinn always looked at her - as she spread her legs wider and wrapped her fingers around Rachel’s wrist, moving her hand.

Rachel was breathless and a moaning mess but her jaw dropped when she realized that Quinn was allowing her to touch her, moving her hand on the blonde hair.

She took the hint, tightening the perfect ponytail and pushing Quinn like she always had wanted to, making Quinn moan.

It was the strongest orgasm she had until then.

After the eleventh time, it was hard to sleep.

It was hard to ignore whatever reaction her body was showing.

It was more than clear what she needed, what she craved. Focusing on her breathing was just making her aware of the tingle in her limbs and the need between her legs.

She pressed her thighs together a few times, drawing it out, trying to stop the ache and start to sleep.

But as soon she closed her eyes, Quinn tormented her night, and the feeling of her hands on the inner thigh and her tongue on her body was devastating.

So Rachel did it.

She needed to sleep and there was only one way to solve the problem.

It was 3.30 a.m., her room was dark and her dads were sleeping.

_Damn Quinn Fabray._

Rachel slipped her fingers into her panties and traced them through the wetness that she found there.

She moaned, loudly. It was embarrassing the way the simple thought of Quinn Fabray’s tongue could make her so wet.

Rachel gently passed the pads of her two fingers up either side of her clit, tracing slow, easy circles around her clit, biting her lips as frames of their session in the locker room passed through her mind.

“Quinn.” Rachel moaned as she plunged her fingers into her slick sex.

She wanted to come so badly but not yet. Quinn loved teasing her, giving her the strongest orgasms of her entire life.

All Rachel could think about was Quinn on top of her, giving her what she needed, roughly palming her breast with her delicate hand, tugging and pulling, and twisting at the nipple to send little shivers of molten electricity to her core.

She suffocated a scream into the pillow while she couldn’t even breathe properly, she was so close, almost there.

What if Rachel would have called her? All she wanted to do was to let Quinn know about what she was doing, because of her.

She came so hard, her pleasure coming down from her thighs and Quinn’s name came out off her lips like a weak whisper.

She collapsed on the bed, tired, her hand still into the panties, helping her come down from the high, her mind blank as she recovered but it wasn’t enough.

Rachel knew she was definitely screwed because of Quinn Fabray after the six orgasms.

It was 6.30 a.m. and Rachel finally could sleep.

The twentieth time was the crucial one.

Rachel sat on the piano, her legs spread widely, on the edge of the pleasure while Quinn’s tongue was deep inside her. She took the courage and moved Quinn’s hand onto her own stomach. Quinn looked at her, without stopping what she was doing, not even when Rachel pushed her hand on the right breast, making Quinn squeeze it. Rachel didn’t even know who moaned louder but she came quickly and hard for the six-time in a row.

Quinn licked the inside of her thighs, possessively biting the bare and shivering skin; then she stood up, cleaning her mouth and looking at Rachel.

She stopped Quinn by the hem of her uniform and pulled her close to her, preventing the girl from running away and steal her panties- again. She had to buy new underwear at the end of the month.

Quinn looked at her confused but didn't turn away.

"I want more." Rachel said as she caught her breath and Quinn looked at her without saying a word.

"I want a bed, I want you in the bed, in all possible and impossible ways." Rachel said, clutching the uniform even tighter in her hands and Quinn swallowed hard.

"That's a lot to ask," Quinn said and Rachel knew she was trying to run away.

“I'm just upgrading our friends with benefits deal. It's not enough for me anymore and I know you want it too." Rachel told her confidently.

It still wasn't clear how Quinn managed to restrain herself, giving without receiving anything in return.

Okay, _maybe - maybe-_ Rachel had an idea but couldn’t still understand how Quinn didn’t ask for anything in return.

"And if I don't?" Quinn asked in a low voice, almost afraid of her own words.

Rachel pulled away a little and stepped off the piano, fixing her panties and skirt as Quinn watched her closely.

“Well, we’re leaving tomorrow for the Regionals. Once we get back, don't bother looking for me after the Cheerios practice." Rachel said, trying to be credible. She picked up the bag she had placed on the chair and turned to Quinn before leaving.

“I'm not your doll, Quinn. You don’t own me."

But Rachel couldn't believe it herself.

Indifference was the best weapon.

Quinn looked like a lost puppy on the way to Regionals. She glanced at Rachel and Rachel felt victory in her hands. Quinn would have given in, at least that was what Rachel hoped for.

Winning the Regionals was all the Glee needed after the flop of the previous year.

That night everyone celebrated in Puck and Finn's room while Mr. Schue was already in his room after their second glass of champagne.

They had already received two reproaches from the other hotel guests, there was too much chaos. Many were down drunk, some puked in the bathroom, others were dancing on the mattresses.

Rachel poured herself a drink and smelled a scent beside her that she knew too well by now.

"Hey," Quinn whispered, approaching her dangerously and Rachel already felt the shivers behind her back.

"Hey." Rachel greeted her, not paying too much attention to her- at least that was what she was trying to do.

The glass nearly fell from her hand as Quinn began stroking her hip and their eyes met.

Rachel took a quick look around to see if anyone was seeing what was going on but everyone was too focused on the music and alcohol.

"I love this skirt," Quinn whispered to her, getting closer and Rachel would have been hypocritical in denying that she wore that skirt on purpose.

"Have you thought about what I told you, Quinn?" Rachel asked, trying not to think about Quinn’s fingers on her hip.

“Why don't we go to my room? I'll show you what I've been thinking about." Quinn proposed and Rachel looked at her surprised.

"I've already told you what I think." Rachel said, taking a sip of champagne to try to calm down.

"Come with me," Quinn told her firmly and Rachel looked around.

"And Tina? Sooner or later she’ll go back to your room." Rachel said, looking for any excuse not to give up but she wasn't even sure about all those excuses she wanted to find.

She wanted Quinn. That was the truth.

"She'll spend the night with Mike," Quinn explained to her. " _Come with me_."

Rachel felt her entire body shiver when she walked into Quinn’s room and heard the familiar click that locked the door.

She turned to Quinn and they stared at each other while the blonde walked closer to her.

“So,” Rachel whispered, trying to not crack her voice.

Quinn didn’t say a word, she just reached the hem of her t-shirt and took it off, leaving Rachel astonished.

“Are you going to watch?” Quinn asked and Rachel shook her head, trying to not collapse looking at Quinn’s bare torso.

Those abs…

Quinn started to unbutton her own jeans but Rachel stopped her.

“Let me.” She whispered looking at Quinn; the blonde nodded and Rachel brought her fingers to the button of Levi’s jeans, popping it open as she watched Quinn holding her breath.

She knelt, helping Quinn step out of the jeans and took courage for leaving kisses along the toned pale legs.

Quinn sighed and closed her eyes as Rachel, little by little, went up to her body, her mouth brushing against the bare skin.

Facing each other, half-naked, with eyes dark full of desire, Quinn pulled down the straps of Rachel’s pink bra, kissing the pulsating point of her neck.

They didn’t kiss. It was their implicit rule. They needed distance to remind them it was simple and amazing sex. Nothing more, no feelings involved.

But Rachel loved the touch of Quinn’s lips against her neck, the sucking and the licking. It was just a starter of what Quinn would have done.

Rachel moaned when Quinn’s lips wrapped around the erect nipple, her bra already on the floor – she didn’t even notice where it fell. She tightened the blonde locks, pushing Quinn closer, arching her back, exposing herself.

A moan ripped through her throat at the sensation and she felt a gush of wetness flooding her underwear. Quinn swirled her tongue around the nipple before flicking the perked bud back and forth. Then she tugged on it with her teeth, earning another moan, before sucking it into her mouth and releasing it. When she moved to the other breast Rachel stopped her, making Quinn look at her confused.

Rachel wanted to touch Quinn Fabray.

She needed to feel her body, discover every single piece of skin.

Her hands reached the clasp of Quinn’s black bra, undoing it and quickly tossing it away and she gulped.

Quinn looked at her without saying a word, she just waited for Rachel.

Rachel knew it. Quinn always let her choose.

So she put a hand on Quinn’s chest, pushing the girl towards the bed. When the back of her knees touched the mattress, Quinn sat on the bed and Rachel stopped between her legs.

Quinn quickly took off the skirt and the underwear, leaving Rachel exposed before her.

She kissed her stomach, grabbing her hips but Rachel had another idea. She put her hands on Quinn’s shoulder, pushing her slightly away and Quinn stopped, looking at her expectantly.

“Lay down.” Rachel said with a crack in her voice. She couldn’t even speak properly looking at Quinn Fabray almost naked on a bed.

Rachel was on top of her, trembling at the first contact of their naked body. She bit her lips as she climbed on Quinn while the blonde looked at her, barely breathing. For the first time, Rachel kissed Quinn’s neck and finally savored that taste she had always wondered about.

She felt Quinn’s hands reaching her back and scratching slightly, making Rachel’s hips push down on her- she couldn’t even know who moaned first but Rachel knew they both were already desperate, and they just had started.

Rachel placed her hands on both breasts and Quinn arched her back closing her eyes, biting her lip and Rachel felt the pressure explode in her brain and between her legs again and fiercely.

She squeezed again and then again and feeling Quinn’s nipples harden further under her palms caused her to groan, she ran her finger over them and Quinn let out a gasp so shameless that Rachel thought she was going to die right there.

Quinn closed her eyes in ecstasy pushing towards her, Rachel swallowed another moan at the feel of her sex pushed against Quinn’s abs.

When Rachel couldn't handle it anymore, she leaned over and wrapped her lips around the right nipple. Quinn shouted her name and Rachel couldn’t almost come just hearing Quinn scream her name like that.

That thought had been invaded her night constantly, hunting her sleep and her body; having Quinn like that was the fucking prize for sleepless nights.

Rachel focused on the other breast, biting first while her hand scratched the length of Quinn’s abdomen, finally reaching the hem of her underwear.

“Rachel,” Quinn whispered, her face red and eyes closed in ecstasy and Rachel shivered, hearing her voice full of desire just for her. “Take it off.”

Rachel bit her lips, squeezing her legs as a shot of pleasure hit her again; she knelt between Quinn’s legs and took the elastic and pulled it off without too many thoughts, tossing it randomly in the room.

And Rachel almost fainted because she could smell her, the intensity of the moment made her head spin and she grabbed unintentionally Quinn’s thigh, making her moan.

“I never…” She whispered, looking at what was before her and her heart started beating fast and uncontrolled. Quinn lifted her head up, watching her, breathing hard and her hands gripped deathly the white sheets.

“Do you want to stop? We can.” Quinn barely said, slightly closing her legs and passing her hand through her hair.

“Do you? I don’t know what I’m doing and I don’t want you to be unsatisfied becau-“ Rachel started rambling but Quinn stopped her.

“Rach, I took cold showers for two months. I’m so close it’s embarrassing, so whatever you will do, it’s okay. But we can stop, the last thing I want is traumatizing you. But we have to stop now.” Quinn said looking at her seriously and Rachel felt a weird feeling in her chest knowing Quinn worried about her and her insecurities- Finn only worried about his (failed) performances.

But Rachel wanted her, wanted to feel and taste her.

So she licked her lips and, without too many second thoughts, pushed away any worry that was exploding in her brain at that moment and leaned between Quinn’s legs, pushing shyly her mouth on the wet heat.

She closed her eyes, moaning unintentionally and Quinn followed her, screaming her name in ecstasy.

_Yes. That was all Rachel wanted to hear._

She could finally understand the reason why Quinn knelt between her legs every day for at least an hour.

Rachel felt drunk on power looking at the white knuckles of Quinn’s hands when her tongue flattered against the wet center.

Her hand was on Quinn’s stomach- Rachel was obsessed with it-, tracing its way in circles up to her breast, looking at Quinn’s face from between her legs as she rolled her nipple between the first and second finger.

“Fuck.” Quinn moaned, squirming under her touch, covering her face with both hands.

Rachel was sure she was in heaven, running her tongue over every inch and then down; then she swirled her tongue and sucked; her name came out of Quinn’s mouth like a melody.

“You can touch me, Quinn.” Rachel said, purposely flattening her tongue from the center to the clit, just barely circling it.

Quinn closed her eyes and arched her back, gripping the headboard.

“No, I can’t.” She whispered and Rachel could feel she was close.

But Rachel was decided, she just needed Quinn to touch her, to make her feel what she felt.

She grabbed Quinn’s hand and placed it on her head as she pushed inside Quinn, circling and stretching, taking everything she could and Quinn couldn’t even pretend to hold back. She tightened Rachel’s hair and kept her in place while her hips pushed against Rachel’s mouth unforgivably.

Quinn stared at her in shock, completely red in the face and her mouth open in panting.

Rachel pushed as hard as she could and Quinn came screaming her name. Rachel moaned as she felt the small hot gush wetting her mouth and her lips.

It was addictive that taste and when Quinn pulled her up, looking at her with those dam hazel eyes, a dangerous and alarming thought hunted Rachel; her mind was screaming “ _kiss me_ ” but Rachel couldn’t even think about it because Quinn pushed her on the mattress and was on top of her.

“You make me crazy,” Quinn whispered, assaulting her neck, ravishing the inviting skin.

That unexpected confession made her eyes open wide and she wrapped her legs around Quinn’s hips, pulling her impossibly closer.

Quinn smiled then she blocked her hands, wrapping her fingers delicately around Rachel’s wrists, pulling them down on the mattress. Rachel felt her breath failing as she watched the satisfied expression on Quinn’s face.

She tried to push her hips against Quinn’s leg to relieve the painful pleasure while Quinn was so focused on leaving dark bruises on her skin.

“Quinn.” Rachel moaned breathlessly as the girl let her tongue play with the erect nipple. “The whole point of this situation is that I want to able to touch you too,” Rachel complained while Quinn kept her pinned on the mattress with her left hand while the other hand traveled down her body.

“Really?” Quinn asked smiling, teasing her, pushing her leg on Rachel purposely and the brunette squirmed again.

“Yes, and it’s not fair.” Rachel said, feeling Quinn stroke her entrance circularly.

“I know, right?” Quinn said, pushing two fingers inside her for the first time and Rachel threw her head on the pillow, arching her back and lifting her hips up.

Quinn was looking at her, her eyes dark and Rachel’s mouth fell open, tightening Quinn between her legs.

“Oh my God!” Rachel screamed as Quinn started thrusting inside her with an unforgivable rhythm.

Quinn freed her hands and leaned over her neck; she began to push with more force and fervor. Rachel’s hands immediately reached Quinn’s back, her nails digging the pale skin while Quinn kept pushing inside her roughly; Rachel couldn’t even breathe properly, it was too much.

Quinn pushed into her to the knuckle before dragging her fingers out and pushing them inside again, keeping her eyes locked on Rachel.

It made her crazy, the way Quinn was looking at her made her legs tremble and, when Quinn tried to look away, Rachel tightened the blonde locks in her hand, keeping her right where she was.

But Quinn closed her eyes and added a third finger. It was all she needed to come.

One way or another, Quinn always ran away.

* * *

Rachel gasped when Finn sang to her “Kiss me” by Ed Sheeran.

The boy took her by surprise when, after the performance, he took her hands and kissed her before she could really say anything. And as he looked at her with his tender half-smile, Santana's apprehensions and sarcastic comments on the background, Rachel saw Quinn looking at her with an emotionless face.

"Can we talk?" She asked as she approached Quinn at her locker.

"Hey," Quinn told her with nonchalance.

_Okay, I didn't expect this._

Rachel had already foreseen three thousand scenarios, all of them ended badly.

“I want to clarify what happened in the Glee…” Rachel said but Quinn cut her off.

“I know, Rachel. Now that you're with Finn, it’s obvious our deal is over." Quinn told her calmly.

Rachel didn't know if she was more bothered by the way Quinn spoke, - she hardly seemed to care- or the fact that she already considered Finn her boyfriend. “I'm happy for you. In the end, that's what you've always wanted, right? Maybe it's the right time." Quinn told her and Rachel looked confused.

"That's all?" The words came out uncontrolled, without even masking her disappointment.

“Rachel, we weren't dating. It was fun and really satisfying but that's all." Quinn answered her, closing the locker.

"I hope he makes you happy," Quinn said, looking at her with a smile. "And that he's as good as I am, but we both know that's impossible," Quinn added, winking at her and leaving her there, like a fool, an inert body.

Rachel stared into space for a few moments; the blood froze when she realized what had happened.

She was just a toy, a doll Quinn liked to use.

_“I’m not your doll. You don’t own me.”_

She quickly wiped a rebellious tear and walked into the cafeteria.

At the end of the day, she saw Kurt and Mercedes running towards her with an incredulous expression.

"What happened?" Rachel asked curiously, looking into Kurt's wide eyes while Mercedes looked around.

"Did you hear what happened?" Kurt asked her and Rachel shook her head, more curious than ever.

“Quinn literally went crazy. She ordered a mass slushies attack and she got into a fight with a girl from the swim team. Even Santana got scared." Kurt told her quickly and Mercedes nodded.

"She’s acting like Satan, coming back from hell only to crucify people," Mercedes added.

“And do you know what that means?” Kurt asked her and Rachel shook her head again, this time scared and more confused than before.

What was wrong with her? Since Quinn had rejoined the Cheerios and Glee club, she had almost given up on slushies.

"It means you have to be careful because you could be the next," Mercedes told her and Rachel frowned.

"Me? What have I got to do with this? Quinn would never do that." Rachel said indignantly.

"Hello? Finn is your boyfriend, again. Is it just a coincidence that you got back together five hours ago and she started acting like a bitch again? I don’t think so." Kurt said firmly and Rachel didn't want to believe it.

Quinn knelt between her legs for two weeks, it was impossible even to think that she was jealous of Finn.

Was it absurd to want to believe that Quinn had done that because of her?

_The first infidelity._

_The twenty-second time._

Her parents had organized a birthday party for her in the basement; Kurt took care of the decorations and the whole Glee club was invited.

Finn and Sam were singing a duet, everyone was singing with them, drinking and messing around and she saw Quinn approach her with a half-smile.

"Why are we always the only ones who don't get drunk?" Quinn asked her, watching how Puck had started a striptease.

Rachel smiled faintly. "Because we don’t want to humiliate ourselves?" Rachel said and Quinn laughed, nodding.

"They’ll be unconscious within twenty minutes," Quinn said, watching how their friends ended up.

"Do you want to stay?" Rachel asked as she watched Quinn take a sip of the Cube Libre Puck had made.

It was wrong to want Quinn to stay, she knew in her heart.

"Hey, Racheeeeel," Tina screamed across the room. "Where are my popcorns?" The girl asked with a sad face.

Tina was the depressed drunk of the group.

"I'm going to get them." Rachel said reassuring her and Quinn smiled.

"Come on, I'll keep you company."

Tina never got her popcorns.

Rachel smiled, they were lying very close on her bed; Quinn told her about the time coach Sylvester wanted to stick Brittany into a cannon.

"I saved Brittany saying she was the best dancer on the whole team and luckily coach Sylvester wasn't willing to take the risk," Quinn said incredulously and Rachel laughed.

"Oh, what a hero you are," Rachel told her, teasing her.

"That's not exactly what Julie told me when I suggested Coach to choose her," Quinn said and Rachel opened her mouth outraged.

“Oh my God, Quinn! You're terrible!" Rachel told her, tossing her popcorn and Quinn laughed heartily.

"I know, it's my virtue," Quinn said proudly and Rachel shook her head.

"You're so…" Rachel started but couldn't finish the sentence because she probably didn't know what she meant and Quinn looked at her.

"How am I?" Quinn asked curiously; the silence of the room was beginning to be embarrassing.

“You know how you are. The mean and charming girl who always gets what she wants from others." Rachel gestured to make her laugh a little.

“Isn't that what you like about me, deep down? Didn't you get excited by the thought that I was actually kneeling between your legs? " Quinn said nonchalantly as Rachel nearly had a heart attack.

It had been a while since they last talked about their situation.

And since then Quinn had always behaved normally, with respect. She could even say that she had become her friend.

That question had just got everything into the game again.

"You're always so full of yourself, aren't you?" Rachel asked jokingly, trying to sidetrack the subject and Quinn smiled.

"You liked it as much as I did, Rachel."

Rachel.

She loved the way her name came out of that mouth.

Rachel didn't think as she tightened the blouse Quinn was wearing in her hands, squeezing it.

She wanted Quinn and Quinn knew it and leaned closer.

“We're going to do something stupid, Rachel. Something really stupid and if we start, I don't know if I’ll be able to back down." Quinn warned her and Rachel felt the familiar sensation at the base of her stomach and between her legs.

In a rush of courage, Rachel pushed Quinn back onto the bed and straddled her.

Quinn just looked at her, waiting as always. It was unnerving because all Rachel wanted was Quinn to take what she wanted from her, in all the possible ways. But Quinn decided to be mature and rational and Rachel couldn’t even hate her.

She took off the blue shirt Quinn was wearing and tossed it on the floor; Quinn did the same with Rachel’s white top and quickly reached the clasp of her bra, undoing it and taking it off.

As she moved her mouth across to Rachel’s breast, Quinn’s hands were making their way up to Rachel’s thighs, pushing up her black skirt as far as possible, over her ass so it was bundled around her hips.

Rachel placed her hands on Quinn’s shoulder and spread her legs wider, her hips jerking in vain trying to find a sort of friction.

She was desperate for Quinn’s touch after months apart; her body belonged to her and it was hypocritical to deny it, especially after Finn’s failed attempts to make her feel good.

The truth was that Quinn Fabray knew every single part of her body, her fingers and her tongue mapped every single piece of her and nothing seemed to live up to her.

She felt damned when Quinn pushed two fingers inside her unceremoniously, looking at her like she was the most beautiful thing on Earth; Quinn always made her feel like that, with every gaze and touch, even when she tried to run away.

Every time they found themselves in a bed, Rachel could say something in them had changed. Quinn knew it too but they always did a good job of denying it.

The constant compulsion to feel Quinn’s lips pressed on hers was insane and made it way in her mind like a broken record.

And for a minute, just for a minute, when their foreheads were so close and Rachel was riding her fingers like there was no tomorrow -while Quinn looked at her, her free hand on her ass, pushing and helping her-, that thought started to take over her mind and holding back was the most impossible thing Rachel did.

Thank God, Quinn tightened her hair between her fingers and pulled her head back, exposing her neck and its pulsating point to her mouth.

When she came, Rachel collapsed on Quinn’s lap and held her closer trying to catch up her breath and it was all over.

She felt damned because Quinn kept running away and all Rachel could have was a part of her.

"It can't happen anymore," Rachel whispered to her, eyes closed while Quinn gently stroked the lower back.

"I know."

They were good at ignoring the big elephant in the room. They acted like friends, talking about the happenings of everyday life, about the new vegan restaurant a few steps from Breadstick, about coach Sylvester's crazy workouts, and about the songs Rachel was rehearsing.

When Finn proposed to her, Rachel felt the world fail under her feet.

Kurt and the others gaped, stunned. Santana rolled her eyes but Quinn, Quinn didn't even look surprised, she looked bored.

_Was it all so obvious?_

"I have to think about it."

Rachel saw Finn's hurt expression and when the bell rang, she quickly left the classroom. She had hidden in the auditorium; Finn and Kurt had been texting her and she didn't even have the courage to reply.

Rachel took a look at the clock and walked towards the exit.

She knew where to go, her legs walking on their own, briskly towards the football field. The cheerleaders were walking into the locker room while Quinn, Santana and Brittany were finishing their run laps.

"Are you lost, Berry?" Santana asked as they stopped in front of the girl.

"Guys don't have football practice on Fridays," Brittany said, realizing that Rachel was probably looking for her boyfriend.

"Actually, I'd like to talk to you, Quinn." Rachel said looking directly at the girl but Quinn wasn't surprised.

Santana started looking at them both, waiting for directions from Quinn.

"See you in the locker room," Quinn told her friends, leaving Santana somewhat perplexed.

Brittany smiled at Rachel before leaving, pulling Santana with her.

Rachel looked at her, a visible coat of sweat covered Quinn's forehead while she fixed her ponytail. She was perfect and she didn’t smell like a garbage dump.

"Look, I need your advice abo-about an adult problem." Rachel said, trying to focus and Quinn's wide eyes.

"Holy crap. Are you pregnant? Is that why Finn proposed to you?" Quinn asked alarmed and Rachel hurried to shake her head.

“No, that's the problem. Look, I'm coming to you as a friend and, oddly, because I also think that you're the only person that will give me just a straightforward and thoughtful answer about this. " Rachel explained to her and Quinn sighed, because she already knew what the subject of that conversation was.

"You can't." Quinn simply said as she wiped the sweat away with the red towel.

"Wha-why? I mean, plenty of people get married at our age, and, I mean, I know that he and I haven’t lived together or anything, but, you know, I love him and he’s the one, I know it. "

“Look, Rach. I’m all for making the most of the new next months, but I’d hate the idea of dragging an anchor from my past into the bright light of my future. And you have an amazing life ahead of you. " Quinn told her honestly. "As hard as it may be, if you want everything that you’ve ever dreamed of, you’re going to have to break up with him."

"That’s an awful thing to say," Rachel told her, deeply disappointed.

Disappointed by the way Quinn seems so superficial about a subject so important to her.

"Look, you wanted a straight and thoughtful. You are a lovely couple but you should think about yourself."

"I was wrong to involve you in this." Rachel said, walking away and Quinn turned to her.

“Why? Didn’t I tell you what you wanted to hear? Grow up, Rachel."

_The second infidelity._

_The twenty-third time._

They didn't talk much after that time and it was a problem – and torture-, because there were Nationals that day, and Rachel couldn't afford any distractions.

She barely had managed to heal her relationship with Finn after she refused his ring.

Rachel wasn't ready for the wedding and she knew it. She only needed Quinn to throw the truth in her face, that was what she needed.

Finn hugged her happily as they lifted the Nationals victory trophy.

She still couldn't believe it.

High school was over, she had won the first major competition of her life, she was waiting for confirmation from NYADA and she had a boyfriend who loved her.

Quinn smiled softly at her as they found themselves in the hotel elevator and Rachel felt again the tightening of her heart that had plagued her for months. They weren’t alone; thank God, two women were friendly conversing about the last article on the New York Times but the silence was painful to handle as they stared at each other.

And it was pathetic how Rachel wanted to cup her face and kiss her. It was pathetic the way Rachel missed Quinn's attention.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Quinn warned her as the two women walked out of the elevator and the doors slid quietly shut.

“How am I looking at you?” Rachel asked in a whisper and Quinn sighed.

“I’m really trying to let you choose but it’s hard to take a step back when I all want is...” Quinn explained not completing her sentence and Rachel bit her lips, playing with her hands.

“I’m not going to stop you,” Rachel admitted, her voice cracked unintentionally under the intense gaze.

“I can’t,” Quinn said back, shaking her head.

“You can do whatever you want, I want you to take whatever you need,” Rachel admitted, starting to notice the familiar feeling in her stomach while Quinn reached her, pushing her against the wall of the elevator.

Seven more floors.

“Whatever I want?” Quinn asked, their lips dangerously close for the first time and Rachel was sure she was on the edge of faint just at realizing what Quinn was about to do.

She nodded as she wrapped her arms around Quinn’s neck, keeping the blonde from running away.

Quinn looked at her lips and then at her eyes, Rachel was on a mental breakdown because she couldn’t handle it anymore.

“If you won’t, I will.”

Then Quinn moved forwards, closing the short distance between the two of them, her fingers threading up into brown hair. Rachel whimpered and closed her eyes.

Boom. Fireworks.

Years ago, Finn said that kissing Quinn Fabray made him feel fireworks.

He was so damn right.

Kissing Quinn Fabray in the elevator of the hotel in New York was something she didn’t even think was possible.

Kissing Quinn Fabray.

She was sweet but demanding- Rachel knew Quinn always tried to make her feel comfortable and it made her heart melt. Rachel moaned, whimpered, and trembled beneath the intensity, the feeling was devastating. She pushed Quinn impossibly closer, her lips parted when she felt the delicate caress of the tip of Quinn’s tongue skim over her lips , offering a deeper kiss.

Rachel knew there was no going back, she didn’t want to because those lips were addictive and she felt Quinn all over her body.

Quinn groaned at the first touch of their tongues and Rachel felt her legs tremble while two hands kept her tackled against the wall.

Rachel bit and nipped at Quinn’s lips, scratching with her nail Quinn’s abs under the white t-shirt.

Quinn tore her mouth from her, their breath hitching when the doors opened and Rachel knew it was just the start. Quinn grabbed her hand and, after two minutes, she found herself tackled against the door of Quinn’s room.

Everything was different because their lips parted only when breath was required.

Rachel thought having sex with Quinn Fabray was something totally mind-blowing but having sex with Quinn Fabray on every surface of the room and the bathroom- while their mouth parted for no more than ten seconds- was a whole different story.

A beautiful, amazing, extraordinary story.

It was a whole different story when Quinn kissed her while she slotted their hips together, making Rachel gasp at the feeling of wet slickness pressing against hers.

It was intimate, more than other times because Quinn was kissing her fiercely and her breath hitched as Quinn pressed further, rocking faster.

After one of the most intense orgasms of her life, Quinn didn’t get tired of kissing her, claiming her lips and Rachel let her do whatever she wanted to because she had waited far too long to have Quinn like that.

A part of her purposely ignored the fact the Quinn had waited for that moment, too.

"I got into Yale, early admissions," Quinn whispered to her as Rachel stroked her bareback.

Rachel stopped her caress and looked at her shocked. “Oh my God! Quinn!” Rachel screamed in awe. “It's absolutely fantastic, Quinn!" Rachel said hugging her happily, unaware of their bare bodies touching. "It's what you've always wanted." Rachel said softly and Quinn smiled.

"I'm leaving Wednesday, my mother wants to visit the campus," Quinn said and Rachel didn't stop smiling at her, even though she was actually struggling with the tears that were forming in her eyes.

She knew Quinn wanted to leave Lima and all the problems behind. She wasn’t ready to be left behind too.

"I am happy for you, I'm proud of you," Rachel whispered and Quinn gave her a chaste kiss.

Rachel closed her eyes, smiling against Quinn’s lips, and, for a moment, everything seemed perfectly balanced, perfectly in tune.

“NYADA is your world, Rachel. Don't let anybody take that away from you.”

That was their goodbye.

A week later Quinn left for New Haven.

* * *

Five months had passed.

New York was chaotic and fascinating; sharing the apartment with Kurt helped her to feel less alone and disoriented; NYADA had turned out to be a viper’s nest fighting each other for the first place and, as intimidated as she was at first, Rachel enjoyed the competition.

She had found her place in the world.

Metro-North Railroad was very busy that afternoon; she watched the landscape out the window with a look that hid all the emotions she felt at that moment.

A large blue sign welcomed the students; the expanses of green lawn and the buildings expressed the magnificence and importance of the place.

Rachel smiled because she pictured it right like it was.

She asked around for information to orient herself because the maps she had found on the internet didn’t help her- probably because she had the sense of orientation of a sloth.

When she managed to walk into the correct building, the sound of her footsteps was almost disturbing in that completely silent lobby.

Rachel hoped she had found the right door, then she waited a few seconds, trying to take courage.

_You are Rachel Berry. You're not afraid of anything, apart from spiders, mice and Santana Lopez._

She took a deep breath and knocked on the door, twice.

The footsteps approaching behind the closed door made her heart beating impossibly faster, almost bursting out of her chest.

"Rachel."

"Quinn."


	2. New York- New Haven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Thank you for reading the previous chapter, I'm glad you liked it.  
> Many of you asked me for a second chapter and here it is!  
> Like I said before, English isn't my first language, pls forgive my grammatical mistakes.  
> Let me know what you think about this new chapter :)

_The twenty-fourth time_

"Rachel."

"Quinn."

Quinn looked at her in disbelief, surprised.

She wore a white Ralph Lauren t-shirt and Levi’s jeans, her hair up and she fixed the glasses she was wearing.

So simple, she was beautiful.

"What are you doing here?" Quinn asked with a confused smile. "Weren't we supposed to meet on Saturday?"

"Surprise!" Rachel smiled, slightly embarrassed, and Quinn shook her head and hugged her.

"You're completely crazy, Berry," Quinn whispered in her ear and Rachel blushed smiling. "Come in."

Rachel had missed all of that.

Five months had passed, they were best friends.

At least that was what Quinn had said to her and Rachel knew it was true.

When she first set foot in New York, when she came back home after the first day at NYADA, when Cassandra July made her life a living hell, when she broke up with Finn, Quinn was her constant, her touchstone.

Quinn texted her as soon as she lied on the bed of her room at Yale and Rachel sighed relieved because, after what Quinn had said when they fought about Finn’s proposal, she was scared.

She didn’t want anything to hold her back and Rachel was afraid Quinn would have left her behind too.

Quinn seemed to know about her fear and she left Metro-North passes in her home mailbox.

Her heart melted when she walked into her home with the passes in her hands.

"Don't forget we're friends, regardless of our amazing sexual chemistry,” Quinn reassured her when Rachel had told her about the breakup with Finn.

They were not meant to be and Rachel knew it, deep down. Quinn was right but she never rubbed her face in it; she just listened to her on Skype while Rachel was on daily mental breakdown.

"I like this room." Rachel said, looking around.

The bed with the blue sheets was neat, the same thing could not be said for the girl who shared the room with her best friend.

The white desk was flooded with law books but Rachel could make out the photo of the Glee club with the Nationals trophy.

Everything was elegant and tidy, like Quinn.

"I am so happy you’re here," Quinn told her as they both sat down on the bed and Rachel smiled.

“Kurt is happy too. At least this is what he said when I had warned him ten minutes ago. I’m sure Blaine just walked into our apartment and they’re having sex on every existing surface.” Rachel said thoughtfully and Quinn laughed confused.

“He didn’t know you were coming here?”

Rachel shook her head.

"I went to the bakery and I bought a vegan cupcake, it reminded me of you,” Rachel explained as if it was the most reasonable thing to say.

Quinn looked at her amused. “That’s a nice way to say that I look like a vegan cupcake?”

Rachel rolled her eyes and she bumped Quinn’s shoulder.

“That’s a nice way to say that I missed you and I remembered the time you had baked vegan cupcakes for me. Here I am after five months.” Rachel said and Quinn smiled, probably because she had a memory about her kitchen almost on fire.

“I thought you were going to freak out," Rachel confessed, biting her lips nervously.

"Really? What made you think such a thing?" Quinn asked her frowning and pushed a lock of brown hair behind her ear, immediately recreating an intimacy Rachel had craved.

“I never know how you will react but you never seem surprised by my words or my actions. Am I so obvious?" Rachel whispered to her and Quinn sighed, moving closer to her.

“You're not obvious, Rachel. You're just ... loud. " Quinn told her softly and Rachel nodded even though she didn't understand what Quinn meant. “And I learned to know you. You’re not obvious but you know what you want and you get it. " Quinn told her and Rachel smiled, moving closer, letting Quinn’s arms wrap her.

She sighed when Quinn kissed her forehead because finally everything seemed to fit together again.

“Do you want to go out tonight? There’s a nice restaurant we can try, it’s vegan friendly.” Quinn said, stroking her head and Rachel hummed blissfully.

“But I need a shower because I got home just to take essential clothes,” Rachel said and Quinn laughed slightly.

“You’re something else, Rachel Berry,” Quinn said, standing up and walking to her wardrobe, taking her bathrobe.

“Here’s to you,” Quinn said as Rachel walked close to her and took the bathrobe.

“Feel free to join me,” Rachel whispered, leaving a kiss on Quinn’s cheek.

It didn’t take long for Rachel to feel a warm chest pressed to her back and a pair of delicate arms wrapping around her body. She sighed blissful, laying her head back on Quinn’s shoulder and the water drummed on her chest and neck.

Quinn kissed her shoulder and lightly pressed her body to Rachel’s back. Rachel leaned into her as Quinn’s mouth dropped to the juncture between her neck and shoulder, gently sucking while her hands wandered all over her body, stroking, squeezing, and scratching.

“I’m just having a déjà vu,” Quinn whispered in her ear as she slowly dragged her hands down Rachel's neck and jaw, over her collarbones to her nipples, clamping them between her fingers and tugging lightly, twisting them a bit to work lewd moans out of Rachel's throat.

Rachel hummed because words couldn’t even come out of her mouth when Quinn teased her like that.

“Do you remember our afternoons in the locker room?” Quinn asked her, her fingers parting her lips and Rachel leaned into her completely, gripping Quinn’s forearms.

“Yes.” Rachel said sharply- probably not answering to Quinn’s question but that was the reaction to Quinn’s thumb making lazy circles around her clit.

“I have so many memories.” Quinn murmured and Rachel turned her head towards Quinn, their eyes met and Quinn kissed her for the first time after five months.

She slid her tongue into Rachel’s mouth and their tongues danced as Quinn pulled her in closer and Rachel run her hands through blonde locks.

Quinn moaned into her mouth and Rachel felt the little spark in her heat, a shiver along her spine made her turn and Quinn looked at her breathless.

Rachel cupped her face and brought their lips together again. She licked Quinn’s bottom lip and then took it between her teeth, hardly enough to make Quinn whimper but not enough to cause her pain and she growled on her mouth, the sound traveling like waves on Quinn’s body and, when her mouth opened with the sound, Rachel’s tongue slips in.

Rachel wanted to devour her, devour her like she wanted, and dreamed and needed for months and months.

Her lips moved from Quinn’s mouth and her teeth grazed her jaw as she buried her face in the crook of Quinn’s neck and her scent hit Rachel like a hurricane.

Quinn moved her until Rachel’s back hit the wall, her hands on the shoulder blades to soften the impact and kissing her harder.

Maybe it was because she had missed Quinn and their intimacy or just because Quinn reminded her of their meetings in the locker room, but it made Rachel go back in time when everything was simple and casual.

Her hand grabbed Quinn’s jaw and stared right at her eyes; Quinn was breathless, her lips were swollen and the hazel eyes were dark as a black hole.

“On your knees.” Three words whispered with so much intensity that Rachel could see Quinn inhaling sharply and trembling.

And just like that, Quinn between her legs, her tongue deep inside and her hands gripping her ass with a deathly hold, Rachel was back in the Cheerios locker room.

When she closed her eyes, it almost felt like nothing changed at all.

Rachel just got out of the shower, Quinn was fixing the bed when the dorm door opened.

"Fuck, this life is killing me." A raven hair girl said, closing the door behind her and slovenly placing the bag on the messy bed.

Quinn cleared her throat and the girl finally turned to them and noticed Rachel’s presence.

“Oh, we have visitors. Who are you?" The girl asked with a smile that seemed quite fake.

"Rachel, this is Kate, my roommate." Quinn hurried to say, saving Rachel from embarrassment.

“Oh, you are _the best friend_ ,” Kate said and Rachel could hear the mocking tone in her voice.

Rachel got a bad feeling when she caught the girl staring at the blue bathrobe that covered her body - it was Quinn's.

"Pleased to meet you." Rachel said, putting on a fake smile too while green eyes analyzed her.

"My pleasure. I thought you were coming on Saturday." Kate said confused.

Rachel could say the girl wasn’t so happy about her presence.

"I have a fondness for surprises." Rachel shrugged and Quinn smiled at her softly and then she turned to the roommate.

"I know I said we were going to Tiziano's but…" Quinn said but Kate cut her off.

“Why don't we go there anyway? Rachel can join us.” Kate said and Rachel couldn’t not notice Kate emphasized the fact that _she_ would have joined them. 

0-1 for Kate.

“Do you like Italian food?" Kate asked completely ignoring what Quinn was saying.

"She is vegan," Quinn told her.

"Oh, your life must suck," Kate said and Rachel really wanted to answer her in kind and protest but she didn't want to ruin the evening.

"I'm sure I can find something that suits my taste." She said, faking another smile before Quinn could defend her.

"Are you sure?" The blonde asked her and Rachel nodded.

"I'm going to get ready." Rachel said, giving her a kiss on the cheek before walking to the bathroom as she felt Quinn's gaze following her.

1-1.

The first impression Rachel had had of Kate was correct. She was a bitch but Rachel was a pro handling her ridiculous barbs.

It all started when Quinn looked at the dress she wore that night.

“That’s what you define essential clothes?” Quinn asked, her eyebrow raised and a light blush on her face.

“A girl must always be ready.”

The black dress wrapped her body in all the right places, it reached just above the knees, a little revealing thanks to the slight neckline, and Quinn couldn’t even put two words together without looking like a dork.

“It this a 2016 Marc Jacobs dress? I thought it vanished into thin air.” Kate asked with her stupid face, trying to embarrass Rachel.

Rachel fixed her dress looking at herself through the mirror and smiled.

“Well, I liked it and Isabelle Wright is so generous with presents.” Rachel said back and she smiled proudly when she saw Kate’s surprised look through the mirror.

2-1 for Rachel.

Kate thought she knew everything about Quinn and it was extraordinarily ridiculous.

It was like a tennis match and Quinn was the tennis ball, unaware of what was happening before her eyes.

Rachel wasn’t outdone; a caress and a kiss on Quinn’s cheek was enough to set the record straight.

Kate had no right to treat her like that and Rachel felt the urge to claim Quinn every second of that night.

"She likes you," Rachel told her when they both went to the bathroom to remove make-up.

"I don’t think so," Quinn said as she pulled her hair back into a messy bun.

_Adorable._

Rachel stared at her through the mirror. "If she’d had the chance, she would have stuck a fork in my hand and in my soul," Rachel whispered and Quinn laughed amused.

"Well, worse for her," Quinn told her, kissing her bare shoulder and opening the bathroom door.

Waking up three days in a row with a naked Quinn Fabray in her arms was a privilege Kate couldn’t have – shouldn’t have-, but knowing that she shared days and nights with Quinn made her feel uncomfortable.

Quinn didn't seem to care and Rachel felt slightly relieved.

"Wait for me in New York."

Those were the last words Quinn said to her at the station.

They were full of promises.

The twenty-eighth time was intense, passionate and uncomfortable.

Was she jealous? _No._

Quinn just arrived in New York; she had booked a hotel room near the apartment Rachel shared with Kurt and Santana. Quinn didn’t want to stay at their place because she knew they would have killed each other – and because they should have explained to Kurt and Santana things they weren’t ready to share.

Rachel had to come up with far too many excuses to be alone with Quinn at least one fucking night without Santana being able to take her away.

“She’s my best friend too, midget. Can you just leave her for twenty minutes?” Santana asked her annoyed and Rachel rolled her eyes because – no- she couldn’t leave Quinn, not for a second, not for a minute.

But Santana was probably on the edge of committing a murder- her murder.

Quinn smiled softly.

Four days weren’t enough and Rachel wanted to take advantage of every single minute.

Going around New York, hand in hand, with Quinn Fabray while she shared her latest news about law exams was warmly domestic and familiar. Quinn made her feel safe.

Rachel knew Quinn was beautiful, the prettiest girl she ever saw. Sometimes Kurt teased her about all the boys and girls at her beck and Quinn simply shook her head, smiling amused.

Quinn was beautiful, smart, charming. Everybody succumbed to her beauty. Rachel was her victim, like everybody else.

So, when the waiter brought them the wine Quinn had chosen and seemed very inclined to serve and revere Quinn -completely ignoring her presence just as Quinn ignored his attentions-, Rachel couldn’t even blame him.

Quinn didn’t even look at him but it wasn't enough for Rachel.

For that reason, twenty minutes later, they found themselves in the restaurant bathroom with Quinn tackled between Rachel and the sink.

"You have to be quiet," Rachel whispered, her fingers tracing the length of Quinn’s sex. "Do you think you can do that for me?”

Quinn nodded furiously, tightening the edge of the sink and Rachel lifted her leg around her own hip to have more space.

“Look at me, Quinn.” Rachel murmured as she stroked Quinn tenderly, back and forth, gathering slickness upon her fingers.

There was something extraordinarily arousing having Quinn unable to look at her because of the pleasure, a sense of pride spread in her chest like a massive wave every time her favorite friend ended up like a trembling mess while her fingers thrust inside with an unforgivable pace.

“Fuck.” Quinn moaned when Rachel thrust her fingers hard up into her then grounded her palm against the fold. Rachel kissed her because hearing Quinn swear was something that made her blood boil- not to mention the heat between her own legs. The kiss was animalistic, she bit and nipped at the lower lip while Quinn’s nails dug into the skin of her forearms and Rachel knew she was close.

Quinn shivered and Rachel felt her fingers squeezed by the pulsating walls; she leaned down to Quinn’s neck and did what she promised she would never have done. Quinn didn’t even protest when Rachel sucked fiercely the exposed skin of the neck, leaving a visible bruise, and she finally let herself go.

When Quinn looked at herself in the mirror, fixing her pink dress, Rachel could see the twinkle in her eyes when her fingertips touched the mark on her neck.

Rachel wrapped her arm around Quinn’s waist and lifted her other hand up; Quinn stared at her thong in Rachel’s hand but she didn’t even say a word.

“This is mine now.”

Rachel felt selfish.

She wanted all of Quinn but was unwilling to share her with anyone.

She was angry with Quinn and with herself.

Quinn knew about Brody and was happy for her, she was finally giving herself a chance.

This was what Quinn had told her.

And Rachel hated her because Quinn was always so damn supportive of her new suitors.

Rachel hated her because Quinn knew, regardless of everyone, Rachel would have ended up in her bed after putting an end to those futile and unsatisfying adventures.

Rachel hated herself for the same reason.

"Damn Fabray, she can’t even answer her damn phone." Santana snorted, staring at the phone.

“She's a Yale law student, she may be busy, Santana. Or she's having sex with her hot roommate." Kurt said nonchalantly as he tried on several jackets. Rachel nearly choked as she drank the water.

The very thought made her want to throw up the vegan pizza she ate.

It never occurred to her the fact that Quinn could have had a date or sex with other human beings because Quinn never mentioned anything like that. Rachel didn’t feel relieved.

"I just want to know if she’s going to stay in Lima for a long time," Santana said without explaining further reasons and Kurt and Rachel didn't seem to want to investigate.

"I choose the blue one," Kurt said and then walked over to his closet.

"You know Quinn wouldn’t even dare to fuck her, right?" Santana whispered while she looked at the phone as if she almost didn't care about what she was saying.

"What are you talking about?" Rachel asked confused.

"You know what I'm talking about, don't play dumb with me, Berry." Santana scolded her, still not looking at her.

"Did…did she tell you?" Rachel asked in a whisper.

“You mean the fact that she’s not fucking her but you?” Santana asked tactlessly and Rachel gulped. “Yes and no. Yes, she told me she keeps ignoring that bitch. No, she didn't tell me you’re fucking each other’s brain out. I figured it out two years ago. " Santana told her and Rachel gasped.

"All this time…" Rachel said but didn't finish the sentence, she didn't know what to think.

“Brittany and I knew from the start. But we are surrounded by blind and deaf idiots. " Santana complained. “How didn’t they see you two getting it on in the Glee class? It’s totally impossible that nobody heard your screams at Nationals.” Santana said incredulous, wrinkling her forehead, “You’re so loud, Berry. Hearing you was like watching porn.” Santana said impressed and Rachel’s jaw dropped.

That was embarrassing.

“We’re just waiting for you to put your shit together.”

Rachel was waiting for that moment, too.

_The twenty-ninth time._

Schuester’s wedding party was a failure.

The party was canceled but Mr. Schue said to entertain the guests.

The Glee club was reunited again and Rachel finally felt at home, singing with the others and having carefree fun.

Finn greeted her with embarrassment, they exchanged a few words; he tried to invite her out to dinner, it was an excuse to catch up but Rachel refused because she saw the sparkle in his eyes.

It was not appropriate.

It wasn't fair.

Cheating him once was enough for her, cheating him a second time would be mean and pathetic.

Finn understood and smiled at her, he walked away and they never spoke again for that evening.

Rachel was thinking of other things.

The focus of her thoughts was talking to Mercedes across the room.

Rachel took a sip of champagne and walked over, smiling at the two girls.

"Hey," Quinn told her, hinting at the empty space on the loveseat and Rachel hurried to sit next to her, making sure to touch Quinn’s bare shoulder with her fingertips, a light touch to thank her.

"After three years I still don't believe you are best friends," Mercedes said and Quinn smiled, looking at her softly.

 _Best friends_.

"Who would have thought it, right?" Quinn asked, placing her hand on Rachel’s bare leg and smiled at her.

After two years they were together, in Lima, Ohio.

They had survived the fights over boys, the slushies, childbirth, the punk phase, the competitions.

They were there.

As best friends? Not even remotely.

Not the moment she tackled Quinn against the wall of their hotel room.

"I thought you were coming with Brody," Quinn said to her, taking off the last piece of cloth that covered her body.

"I broke off our little adventure." Rachel said as she turned her back to Quinn, and the girl took up her hint.

"What happened?" Quinn asked as she bent Rachel over.

That’s it. She was on the bed, on her hands and knees, fully exposed before Quinn, completely at her disposal.

Rachel knew the next day she would have had bruises all over her body.

She knew it, she wanted it. It happened all the time Rachel wanted to use the toy she bought in New York after what had happened with Kate.

They talked about the chance to cross their boundaries and the look on Quinn’s face at her suggestion rewrote history.

"Do you want me to be honest?" Rachel told her as Quinn parted her legs and started to stroke her inner thigh.

“Always,” Quinn said, teasing her with the tip of the strap on and Rachel tightened the sheets between her fingers.

"I couldn't even have an orgasm without thinking about you," Rachel confessed and dropped her head on the mattress as Quinn slammed in on one smooth thrust that made her scream and push back.

“Why that?” Quinn asked, her tone sharp and rough, while she pushed out and came in again, with more force as she planted a firm palm between Rachel’s shoulder blades, pressing her on the bed.

Rachel moaned; she loved when Quinn was rough and dominant, just taking what she wanted from her and Rachel was so willing to let her.

Rachel couldn’t even put two words together; her lungs were missing the air and it was difficult to focus on something that wasn’t the building pleasure in her lower belly.

“How is it? Do you like it when I fuck you?” Quinn asked again, wrapping her hands in Rachel’s hair, fingers curled against her scalp, pulling back at the same time as she thrust forward roughly.

“Answer me,” Quinn ordered, her hand landed harshly on her ass and Rachel arched her back.

“Fuck, yes!” She cried out, her thighs were literally burning and she was on the edge of collapse but Quinn stopped and Rachel almost had a heart attack. “Quinn, fuck, why did-“

“Ride me,” Quinn whispered and Rachel knew she was about to lose control, they both losing control.

When the bed hit the wall under the intensity of her thrust on Quinn’s hips and her hands were on Quinn’s knees to help her herself to push, Rachel could feel an unfamiliar pressure inside her that made her let out a harsh and shrill sound.

The realization hit her like a truck and Quinn widened her eyes because every time Rachel moved a whole symphony of slick and wet sounds filled the silence of the room.

“Rach, fuck, are you-?” Quinn asked, not even able to complete the sentence and Rachel nodded furiously.

“Push harder, baby. Let it go.” Quinn said, starting to quickly circle her clit and Rachel couldn’t hold back anymore; she placed her hands on Quinn’s tightened stomach and immediately lifted her hips, the toy slipped out of her easily as a brutal scream torn from her throat and a clear stream of fluid arced out.

She shattered apart, shaking and moaning, eyes fluttering rapidly, and then she collapsed on Quinn.

“Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God,” Rachel whined, her face buried in the pillow while Quinn wrapped her arms around the trembling body.

They stayed silent for what it seemed like an eternity, Rachel occasionally whimpered as some aftershock wracked her while Quinn held her in her arms, waiting for her to show sign of life.

“It was intense,” Rachel whispered without moving. Quinn could only feel a whiff on her neck.

“I know.”

“That was the second time.” Rachel said like it mattered while she caught her breath again.

“I know,” Quinn said, softly stroking her spine.

“What are you doing to me?” Rachel exhaled and Quinn slightly laughed.

“Well, I can safely say that I just made you squirt,” Quinn answered amused and she heard Rachel groan against her neck.

“That’s so repulsive. And we really need to clean ourselves up, we’re steaky.” Rachel said, gently stroking Quinn’s collarbone.

“I’m going to fill up the tub, okay?” The blonde asked, kissing her temple and Rachel sighed.

“You’re amazing.”

“I know.”

_The thirtieth time._

Well, there wasn't a thirtieth time, but Rachel's heart was full, full of emotion and love.

Quinn showed up backstage with a large bouquet of flowers, along with her parents, Kurt and Santana. The others were waiting for her outside.

"You were incredible, Rachel." Quinn had whispered in her ear when Rachel drove her back to the hotel.

They had all dinner at a restaurant in Central Park and ended the night at a club in the city.

It was four in the morning when Quinn asked her to get in her hotel room.

“Alone at last," Quinn admitted, taking off her high heels and sitting on the bed.

Rachel did the same thing and reached her, lying down beside Quinn.

“I know, it’s hard to share you with other people," Rachel whispered as Quinn stroked her face.

"You don’t have to," Quinn told her, wrapping her hand around her hip and pulling Rachel gently to her chest and Rachel gave her a kiss.

It was long, calm, sweet and meaningful.

Rachel realized that something had radically changed, for quite some time.

The high school hot and passionate sex turned into something she couldn’t even explain.

Rachel was scared while Quinn devotedly held her until they fell asleep.

Lima was her home, her refuge, her safe haven.

When Leroy saw her at the door with tears in her eyes, he welcomed her with a very long hug, no words to crash the silence of that moment.

Rachel took a while to notice the boxes in the living room and the lack of furniture.

Her father gave the final blow with the news of the divorce and the sale of the house where she had grown up.

Three months had passed since the cancellation of her show and Rachel couldn't even stay in New York anymore, it had become her trap.

Santana and Kurt had tried to talk some sense into her. Santana had even pleaded for Quinn's help.

The girl had left New Haven- of course-, just for a day, to make her come to her senses.

When they were alone, Rachel told Quinn she needed space.

Everyone was pressing her, everyone tried to cheer her up and she couldn't bear the idea of failure.

Quinn was there for her, staring right at her soul but Rachel couldn't even stay close to her for more than two minutes.

The failure of her career reminded her of a string of failures of which she was the main responsible. Quinn was responsible for at least 30% of those fiascos.

Rachel was all alone; she couldn't find even a man willing to love her because Quinn Fabray had ruined everything.

What about Quinn? Quinn treated her as always. As a friend, as a best friend, with whom she sometimes spent the night.

"I need space from everyone," Rachel told her. "I need space from you too."

And just as Quinn had arrived, she went back to New Haven three hours later.

Quinn respected her words; they exchanged a few texts from time to time, just because Santana told her Quinn was insanely worried about her.

_'I flew home'_

It was the last message Rachel sent her.

Sue Sylvester had become the principal of McKinley and banned all arts activities from high school while Mr. Schue was the new coach of Vocal Adrenaline.

Rachel completely freaked out but got what she wanted by talking to the DA.

So she was tasked to get the Glee club back on its feet and Kurt was there to help her.

The new kids didn't seem very motivated and Kurt suggested reuniting the old original Glee to show how much their club had changed everyone's lives.

Rachel immediately informed Santana and Brittany; Sam and Finn (the new football team coaches) called Mercedes, Artie, Tina and Mike.

It took her a few days to organize a meeting with her old friends in the auditorium.

It would have been great to work together, to be together again, this time as mentors.

She felt like an adult, walking the halls without anyone throwing a slush at her.

Some had timidly and secretly stopped her to ask what Broadway was like and Rachel felt nostalgia weigh on her heart as she recounted what Broadway meant to her.

She quickly made it to the Glee class as she felt tears begin to form in her eyes.

Was it a mistake to go home and put the Glee back on track?

Would it have been psychological torture?

Rachel didn’t know but when she opened the Glee class door and saw the one person she never expected, her only certainties collapsed.

"Quinn."

"Rachel."


	3. Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Here’s the final chapter of what was originally my one shot but I’m so happy you asked for two more chapters.  
> Thank you for the reviews, for the kudos, and for the bookmarks, I really appreciated it.  
> So, let me know what you think about this last chapter and if this was the right end.  
> As usual, English isn’t my first language so don’t hate me for grammatical mistakes pls.  
> If you have a prompt, my twitter is @_weirdwriter  
> See you soon :)

"Quinn."

"Rachel."

It was a blow to the stomach to see Quinn again after her elusive and pathetic behavior.

Quinn didn't deserve that treatment, she had always been there for her, in every possible way.

"What are you doing here?" Rachel asked as she walked towards her, not even sure of her own voice as Quinn stared at her, leaning her back against the piano.

" _Santana_ told me there was a little emergency meeting to try to get the Glee back on its feet," Quinn answered, making sure to emphasize that Santana was the one who had called her.

Rachel sighed and ran her hand through her hair. "Don't hate me, please," Rachel whispered exasperated and Quinn shook her head.

"I don’t. You asked me for space, Rachel. But I honestly didn't think you wouldn't have talked to me for four months," Quinn said, her face stoic, expressionless.

“It wasn't my intention, Quinn. I pushed everyone away," Rachel said, trying to justify her stupid behavior.

"It's totally understandable but I’m not everyone," Quinn said back and Rachel scoffed.

"Why? Because we have this weird habit of sleeping together, right?" Rachel asked ironically and Quinn walked close to her, her arms crossed and an intense gaze on her face; Rachel felt like Quinn was looking right at her soul.

“We are friends, Rachel. That's just a side effect of our friendship. I don't want to ruin what we have for sex because we are so _much more_ than sex," Quinn frowned at her and Rachel squeezed the edges of Quinn’s shirt, struggling about what to do. Quinn didn't move, she looked into her eyes and Rachel was holding her shirt tighter and tighter.

She then gave up, throwing herself into Quinn's arms as tears began to roll down her face.

“I'm heartbroken, Quinn. It hurts so much," Rachel sobbed, hiding in the crook of her neck.

Her safe place.

"I’m here,” Quinn whispered in her ear, letting her cry while her arms wrapped around her trembling body.

But how could Quinn defend Rachel from her too?

_The thirty-first time_

Saying goodbye to her home was another integral part of the universe mission titled _"Let's break Rachel Berry's heart."_

But Rachel knew she had to resign herself to that loss, as she had done with all the others.

It was part of growing up.

Having the new Glee kids and her old teammates helped her ease the burden that was oppressing her heart. Having Quinn there was definitely what she needed.

She had been a fool to jeopardize their relationship because of her paranoia.

Rachel hated to fail; she hated, even more, everybody watching her failures, her downfalls.

She hated seeing the disappointment on her friends’ faces, their pity.

She hated to disappoint Quinn.

But she hated staying away from her even more and Quinn was always there, ready to listen to her sobbing about her Broadway failures.

"Bring it on, Fabray!" Sam cheerfully screamed as Quinn and Santana sang onstage.

Rachel stared at her dazed as Quinn moved across the stage confidently, despite the two glasses of whatever Puck had prepared for old times’ sake.

" _You got me puttin' time in, time in_

_Nobody got me feeling this way_

_You probably think I'm lying, lying ..._ "

Rachel felt her heart pounding while Quinn began to stare at her insistently, singing the lines of the song.

If Rachel initially felt too presumptuous believing that the song was dedicated to her, she was sure when Quinn sang the chorus, looking at her shamelessly.

_"You got me touchin' on your body_

_You got me touchin' on your body_

_To say that we're in love is dangerous_

_But girl I'm so glad we're acquainted"_

She knew the situation was tense, sexually tense, incredibly tense and endearing.

Quinn attracted her in all possible and impossible, wrong and right ways.

The hidden smiles, the fleeting glances, the whispered words, the small and imperceptible touches, the brushing of their hands.

“Come on, I want to show you something," Rachel told her, taking her hand as Quinn poured herself another drink Puck made, and when everybody’s attention was focused on the stage, they walked out of the basement.

"The Rachel Berry childhood bedroom. I missed it." Quinn muttered as Rachel opened the door of her nearly empty room. "Is it weird to think that someday this room's gonna be recreated in some Broadway museum?" Quinn asked, looking around and focusing on the wall full of memories.

"You said you wouldn't make fun of it." Rachel said scolding her and Quinn smiled, taking a particular photo.

Quinn remembered exactly that moment, their hug at the graduation ceremony, between tears of joy and confetti. She smiled wistfully and probably figured out what was happening to Rachel.

"You can't do it, can you?" Quinn asked her, focusing on the other photographs. "I mean, almost everything else is boxed up, but you haven't even touched this wall."

Rachel sighed and sat on the bed. "All my best memories from high school are on that wall." She said pointing to the wall and Quinn nodded, sitting next to her. "My whole childhood I just spent in this room singing and dreaming, all alone, with pictures of Barbra Streisand and Patti LuPone and Bernadette Peters." Rachel added and Quinn was silent, letting her vent, she just nodded. "But then I met you guys and suddenly the wall started to fill up with real friends and real dreams. And I'm supposed to just pack it all up now?" Rachel asked sighing and Quinn smiled at her, taking her hand and gently stroking it.

"We're gonna need a bigger wall," Quinn said, reassuring her. “The wall doesn't go away. It just gets bigger, higher and plastered in dreams.” She added and those words seemed full of promise and hope.

Quinn was giving her hope.

"But you need to come back to New York and bring that wall with you," Quinn said firmly and Rachel believed it for a moment, believed those words. "And if I'm really lucky, then I'll always be on it somewhere, but don't tell Santana you have a photo of her wearing the blue wig," Quinn said and Rachel just laughed.

"What would I do without you, Quinn Fabray?" Rachel asked her rhetorically and Quinn smiled, giving her a chaste kiss on the lips.

"Anything, Rachel Berry," Quinn whispered, staring at her as she pushed a lock of brown hair behind her ear, and Rachel kissed her again.

The morning after, Quinn's naked body enveloped her and, between gentle kisses and light caresses, Rachel promised Quinn she wouldn’t have repeated the same mistakes.

"Go back to New York, Rach," Quinn told her before leaving but Rachel didn't answer, she just smiled.

They both knew how things would have turned out.

Rachel didn't go back to New York, she couldn't.

She had made a commitment, to lead the new Glee club to victory. On the other hand, it wasn’t like she had anything else to do, the auditions were just a distant memory.

She wasn't happy but she felt comforted by everything around her, even Sue Sylvester made everything more familiar.

"Why didn't you call her?" Kurt asked as they checked the lead sheets.

"What are you talking about?" Rachel asked confused.

Kurt sighed. "Quinn. Why didn't you call her last month? Why are you no longer glued on Skype talking to her? Did you have a fight? " Kurt asked curiously and Rachel ignored the lump in the pit of her stomach.

"I pushed everyone away, you know what happened," Rachel muttered, avoiding his gaze and Kurt looked at her sympathetically.

“But we’re talking about Quinn, Rachel. And despite the fact that I hate that she's more important than me in your life, _she is Quinn_." Kurt said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

_She is Quinn._

God, how right he was.

They had exchanged few texts after Quinn had left for New Haven.

Quinn tried in every way to heal their relationship but Rachel knew that something was broken, things were no longer the same. Her heart knew it, her skin knew it because the last time Quinn touched her, every cell of her body craved her in a distinct way and their eyes met differently.

“Sometimes people depart for no reason, Kurt. We're both busy, that’s all." Rachel shrugged, not entirely convinced by her own answer.

"I thought you would have been attached to the hip after her move to New York," Kurt said casually and Rachel whirled around.

“Did she move to New York? When?" Rachel hurried to ask, her heart starting to beat faster than normal.

"Holy Barbra, you didn’t know? I thought she told you!” Kurt said confused. “I met Quinn and Kate in Manhattan before coming back to Lima.” He added and Rachel felt her heart trembling.

"Kate?"

That name barely came out of her mouth.

Kurt nodded quickly. “Quinn told me about her internship in a law firm and Kate was there to keep her company and for shopping. That girl has a flawless style. Obviously, with that body, everything suits her divinely.” Kurt said and Rachel felt the stabbing pain in her stomach because she knew. She knew Kate was beautiful. “It’s completely understandable that she gave our friend the sapphic twist. After all, college girls love to experiment," Kurt added and suddenly her brain was too full of information, that room seemed too small and she was struggling to hold back the tears that had formed overwhelmingly in her eyes but she didn't cry. She couldn't cry.

The only tears she shed were the ones that rolled out of her eyes as she found herself between Finn's sweaty body and the lockers, his lips rough on her neck, big and crude hands gripping her hips, her breasts, her backside, her body like he owned her. But he didn’t, he couldn’t.

There was nothing passionate, there was nothing delicate.

There was only her desperation as she pretended to relive what she had experienced four years earlier, with a different person than the one in front of her.

Rachel didn't go to New York, she didn't have the courage. But Quinn came back to Lima.

Santana and Brittany had chosen a barn as their wedding location; Rachel hated hay, it made her sneeze every ten minutes and she hated Quinn too, she was worse than hay.

They had greeted each other from afar, with a nod, not even a word. Sitting at the same table, between courses, Rachel told everyone about Glee's news, about the lineup for the Regionals. Mercedes shared her news about her new album; Artie updated them about his new life in California. When it was Quinn's turn, Rachel didn't take her eyes off her for a second. Quinn talked about her internship at Cohen, one of New York's leading law firms. She had already practiced at Alston law firm thanks to the - unwanted - intervention of her father. Rachel almost got a heart attack when Quinn mentioned her father. Had they kept in touch? What happened? Had Russel Fabray helped his disinherited daughter get into one of New York's most coveted law firm?

Five months had passed and they were complete strangers. At least, she didn't mention Kate. It was a good thing, right?

"Find your girlfriend, it’s showtime." Santana had told her, walking past her while she was talking to Kurt.

Rachel rolled her eyes annoyed because Santana kept looking at her disapprovingly.

_I don’t know what to do, what I need to do._

Rachel saw Quinn sitting on the bench behind the barn as she fumbled with the phone.

It was a rustic but charming place, the background music made the atmosphere almost perfect. Kurt did a good job.

"Hey stranger." Rachel caught her attention and Quinn looked up at her. "What are you doing here?"

"I was just checking the emails my boss sent me," Quinn told her, placing the phone in her purse as Rachel sat down beside her.

"For somebody who swore and swore to want nothing to do with this city, it must have been hard leaving New York." Rachel smiled at her and Quinn rolled her eyes smiling.

"Every time I come back here, I have my reasons," Quinn said to her, looking at the pond before their eyes.

“Also because if you had refused, Santana would have probably killed you, Lima Heights style. Although I'm not sure it's a real thing." Rachel said with a confused look and Quinn laughed.

"I didn't come back here just for her," Quinn admitted and Rachel turned to face her. "You should go back to NYADA, Rachel," Quinn told her and Rachel felt her blood boil in anger.

"Don't you start it on me too, please." Rachel warned her but Quinn didn't seem willing to let it go.

“Now or never, Rach. You can't take hide here forever, it's not your place." Quinn said and Rachel jumped up.

"It is my decision. Kurt and Santana had no right to tell you behind my back." Rachel complained and Quinn scoffed, shaking her head.

"Yeah, because you should have told me but talking to me isn’t your priority anymore." Quinn taunted her and Rachel knew the situation was going to get worse.

“I wanted to avoid what's happening right now. Kurt and Santana call you every time they need to convince me to do something. It doesn’t work like that!" Rachel exclaimed angrily and Quinn frowned.

“Kurt and Santana call me every time you need someone to tell you the truth, Rachel. You can ignore it as much as you want but you can’t run away."

“Aren't you tired of this task? I think I'm more than capable of deciding for myself." Rachel pointed out and Quinn sighed, probably because she knew that fight was going to be destructive.

“You assigned me this task asking my opinion about Finn’s proposal. I’ve been doing it for five years, Rachel." Quinn snapped and Rachel widened her eyes.

"You can't imagine how wrong you are." Rachel murmured with a trembling voice. Quinn was pushing her, she was teasing her, she wanted to pick a fight with her.

They were coming to a point of no return and Rachel wasn't even afraid to cross the threshold anymore.

"Really? Think about how wrong _you_ are. It took you so little to run away from this dream-killing city thanks to your immense talent. You fell back when things got more complicated." Quinn said and Rachel felt the words hurt like a knife blade inside her heart. “And that's okay because anyone can hit rock bottom, anyone has the right to run and hide but you're falling back into the usual lame choices. I mean, next thing is sleeping with Finn Hudson so you can get back to Rachel Berry's pathetic routine.” Quinn said and Rachel opened her mouth shocked.

"You're just being awful now," Rachel muttered, looking down and Quinn had the epiphany, it was all pretty clear. She smiled incredulously.

"You did, didn't you?" Quinn asked, standing up and moving closer to her. "I figured out the moment I saw his dopey face and that usual stupid grin reserved for you.”

"You promised you wouldn’t have fucked her!" Rachel screamed, forgetting for a moment that people could have heard her. "You promised it!" She screamed again, feeling her chest burn with anger, and Quinn’s eyes darkened.

“You have no right, Rachel. No right." Quinn whispered, closing her eyes to calm down.

“Because we are best friends, right? It has always been just sex for you. Who knows how many times you fucked her and lied to my face!" Rachel screamed and that opened the Pandora’s box; for a moment she recognized the HBIC attitude and she knew what was about to happen, the end.

"Well, you're right about that. At least, you've always been honest by telling me every time you slept with half of NYADA."

Rachel didn’t know what nervous impulse caused her hand to land on the delicate white cheek. All she knew was that she felt devastated and agonized.

Quinn turned to her, lightly brushing her flushed cheek and Rachel was no longer afraid of what might have come out of her mouth because nothing was worse than what they had already said.

"Now that you've slapped me too, we're even," Quinn said looking into her eyes, and Rachel felt torn apart. “I always let you choose, Rachel. I never asked you for anything in return and I was the first to run away. You wanted more, we had sex, and you were back with Finn in less than 24 hours. From that moment, we tortured each other on your birthday, at Nationals, when you came to Yale, when I came to New York and you told me about Brody and the others. I came to New York at the premiere and you looked me in the eyes, Rachel. You always knew, you just avoided getting a better look at me, you didn’t allow yourself to see me. Tell me again how it was just sex for me." Quinn said quietly but Rachel could see those eyes burning in hers, everything came crashing down.

Rachel stared at her without saying a word because it was humiliating, it was humiliating to feel so coward.

“I have my faults, Rachel. I have so many faults but you were so good at lying, not accepting the fact that we are meant to be together and that no one can have what we have."

It was humiliating, it was humiliating that Quinn could read her like an open book and voice her thoughts.

"I hate you," Rachel whispered as tears rolled from her eyes.

"No, you don’t. You love me and I love you too, but we ruined each other. Nobody compares to you, nobody is like me. We have two choices, we can take note of our situation and make up for the four years we have wasted or we can keep pretending." Quinn said looking at her. "I've already done my part, now make up your mind, as I always let you choose," Quinn told her giving her the final blow.

"My flight is tomorrow morning."

It was an ultimatum.

Rachel was devastated, emotionally shattered, torn, her heart consumed as well as her tears.

That night had been a nightmare; that bed had never seemed so uncomfortable to her and the darkness oppressed her. She hadn't stopped crying for a second.

What had she done?

What was she doing with her life?

What would have happened if she had rejected Quinn that afternoon?

What would have happened if she didn't want more? Why couldn't she be satisfied with her life?

Why had it seemed like a good idea to want Quinn Fabray at her disposal?

Why did she come back to Finn while Quinn was there for her?

Since when had she become a cheater?

Why was she jealous of a stupid roommate?

Why did finally give herself a chance with Brody when Quinn was her chance?

Why had she jeopardized their relationship?

Why didn't she want to go back to New York?

Rachel's head was exploding from all those questions that had one and only answer.

It was five in the morning and the time that the lift took to get her to the sixth floor was infinite, the floor seemed to shrink under her feet. The sound that signaled that she had reached the floor reminded her that there was no longer any reason to back down.

Rachel had the answer and she knocked to look it in the eye.

"Quinn."

"Rachel."

* * *

_Ten years later_

Brittany had a thing for barns and ducks.

Everybody figured it out.

She looked around as the children roamed freely as the adults conversed in the shade of the gazebo, with Bruno Mars in the background.

"I hope the next birthday will be organized in a playroom where all common children celebrate," Kurt said, wiping some hay off his black Balmain jacket.

Rachel smiled and shook her head. "We're talking about Santana Lopez's son, nothing involving Alejandro turns out to be common." Rachel said as she occasionally glanced at the children and at her watch.

“Hey, Berry! Watch your hobbit mouth, I heard you!" Santana told her as she joined them. "What were you raving about, Chip and Dale?" Santana asked, pouring them more wine.

"I hate hay," Kurt said annoyed and Santana rolled her eyes.

“Don't worry, Lady Porcelain. Brittany wants to go to Disneyland Paris next year, so you're safe. You will spend your time running after your children, no hay." Santana said with a shrug and Rachel smiled.

"Blaine won’t be crazy about the idea of chasing Charlotte all over Disneyland." Kurt sighed and Santana raised an eyebrow.

"Why? Where will you go in the meantime?"

“While _you all_ will regret choosing Disneyland as a birthday present, Rachel and I will go shopping through the street of Paris," Kurt answered like it was obvious and Santana scoffed.

"Speaking of birthdays, Elliot wants to celebrate his birthday at Glee while Erick wants to spend it at the carnival." Rachel sighed, sipping more wine.

"Big problem, you should have thought about that before having twins," Santana said and Rachel smiled as she watched her children throw bread at the ducks. She nearly had a heart attack when Elliot ran towards the fence but she sighed in relief when she saw the baby throwing himself into Quinn's arms.

Having twins hadn't been a problem at all, having two beautiful children was the most amazing thing in her life. Sure, they had other real problems but they had dealt with them all.

Making up ten years ago was a problem; the night after Santana and Brittany's wedding, they woke the hotel guests with their screams. They made up at ten in the morning of the day after, over a fruit juice and vegan pancakes. It was clear that they loved each other, they just needed to scream at each other to start over, to look into each other's eyes as they finally made love, to finally accept what they had.

“Thirty-second time,” Rachel whispered, tracing Quinn’s jawline with her fingertip. Quinn looked confused and Rachel kissed her.

“This is our thirty-second time.” She said and Quinn smiled slightly.

“Of course you counted them.” Quinn murmured, not really surprised but amused, and held her even closer. “I didn’t but I remember every single time, every little detail.” She added, intertwining their fingers. “I love you,” Quinn whispered, her eyes full of promises.

“I love you too, I want a whole life with you, Quinn Fabray.”

Quinn’s official job at Cohen was a problem. Rachel yelled at her after two months, because Quinn was completely immersed in work to spend time with her and Rachel definitely didn't want her life to be like that. They made up when Quinn showed up at NYADA with a bunch of flowers and “I’m sorry” cookies - yes, Quinn had stolen her idea but Rachel couldn’t even complain.

Making their relationship public was a problem. Kurt didn't speak to her for two months; he was so mad at her especially after he found out Santana knew everything from the start. They reconciled on a Thursday in November, Rachel asked for his help in choosing a dress to wear at the after-show party. "I'm only doing this because your wardrobe is a catastrophe and Quinn is tormenting me."

The Glee guys were quite surprised and their dinners were full of embarrassment the first couple times after their coming out; Noah tried to lighten the mood with the comments about a possible threesome but there was an obvious embarrassment, especially after everyone found out about the cheatings.

Finn. Finn freaked out when he found out about the start of their relationship. Rachel threw up that night because she couldn't even look him in the eyes when she told him she had cheated on him twice. A kind of truce began between them only when, two years later, Santana called everyone as soon as her waters broke.

Her parents had taken it well. Leroy had always suspected it, Hiram took longer to forgive Quinn. Judy knew everything from the start and, despite having struggled to accept their relationship at the beginning, the first Christmas at the Fabray house wasn’t bad at all.

Judy and Kurt helped them organizing their wedding three years later. Quinn proposed on their anniversary, at Shakespeare Garden.

Judy was there when she was pregnant, she moved to New York after the second ultrasound. She helped them in every possible way buying something new for the babies every day, picking her up at the end of rehearsal, reproaching Quinn for working for too many hours, reassuring her when she felt like a fat whale, calming Quinn down when the surgeons got her to the O.R. for a cesarean section. She was there.

Russell. Russel was a separate problem.

He turned Quinn down multiple times and Quinn didn’t forgive him, not even when Russell got her an internship at Alston. Russell didn’t forgive her when TMZ published a pic of the two of them kissing after the première of Evita, Rachel’s new project.

Rachel contacted him before the wedding, without Quinn knowing.

She waited for him in his office and before he could say a single word, she placed the wedding invitation on his desk. "She is your daughter and she deserves a father who walks her down the aisle and a grandfather to her children."

Needless to say, Russel never showed up. He didn’t show up at the wedding, at the hospital when the twins were born, on their first birthday, at their weird mix between Christmas and Hannukah. But after a year, for every holiday, the doorman delivered two unsigned packs. At first, Quinn's eyes were filled with sadness looking at those cute gifts but then she simply accepted that was a kind of demonstration, an incomplete one. Her father had probably admitted the existence of two, or rather three, new members of the Fabray family.

Shelby was surprised but took it well enough. Beth knew about Quinn and Puck by now. Their visits were always welcomed, Beth loved the books Quinn gave her, she loved going to games with Puck, she was fascinated by Broadway and had grown fond of Elliott and Erick.

Their jobs were a problem. They fought a lot, almost to a breaking point, while the children slept blissfully and unawarely in the cradles. Rachel cried in the bathroom and Quinn left the house. She came back at four in the morning, Rachel waited for her in the dark, sitting on the L-shaped couch in their living room.

“I don't want to fight anymore, Rachel. I'll talk to Tom, I’ll come home at a reasonable hour and spend more time with our family." Quinn told her and Rachel immediately stood up and hugged her.

"I'm taking a break too."

Broadway was her life, getting an EGOT was the icing on the cake and Rachel didn't even think having a family was her dream before it all happened. But Quinn had plunged into her life and holding her children in her arms for the first time, hearing them say their first words, singing them a sweet lullaby, looking at Quinn while she read them fairy tales before going to sleep, weeping with joy when they learned to crawl, having breakfast together at the Blue Box coffee every Sunday, made Rachel realize she had made all dreams come true.

The Fabray-Berry family was a real thing.

Santana and Kurt talked and talked but Rachel couldn't hear them because she was in her own world, completely lost, as she saw Quinn taking Elliott in her arms while Beth took Erick's tiny hand, walking towards her.

And like the first day, when their eyes met, Rachel felt her heart light but full of love, the butterflies in her stomach and a smile forcefully spread over her face.

"Your son has a future as a boxer," Beth said smiling and hugging her, not leaving Erick’s hand.

She had become a beautiful little woman. Her blond hair adorned her sweet and elegant features, her eyes reminded her so much of the hazel eyes that made her fall in love; she definitely had inherited her mother’s eyebrow thing, her father’s grin and their mixed personalities. She had the badass attitude and Rachel laughed every time Shelby told them about her teenager adventures, as the head cheerleader and member of Vocal Adrenaline.

"Let's not share this with Puck, I don’t need him to put wrong ideas in my adorable innocent baby boy’s head." Rachel sighed and Beth nodded resolutely because she knew her father, she had experienced him first hand.

Elliott punched a child that morning because he had offended Charlotte's drawing.

"You defended her honor, didn't you little man?" Quinn asked him, leaving a gentle kiss on the brown hair.

"Nick and I just wanted to protect her, mommy." Elliott said, bringing up Puck's son. "Alejandro chased him into the yard." The six years old boy added and Santana giggled proudly.

Rachel looked at her wife and her best friend with disapproval.

Putting the children in the same school had been a good idea, even though they were in different classes. They were like a small family, a kind of mini Glee club.

“But that doesn't mean you're not grounded. Violence is not condoned in this family, okay?" Rachel said with a serious expression and the baby pouted, his hazel eyes lowered.

Fraternal twins.

Erick was calm and obedient, Elliot was a hurricane, full of energy. Erick loved books and video games and he always won against Puck and Sam but just because they let him win- this was what they said. Elliot loved sports and music, and Finn bought him a drum kit and a football. Those were great gifts until the kid woke up the whole neighborhood playing the drum in the middle of the night and the football accidentally and slightly- as the kid had said – crashed into the mirror in the living room.

"Come on, let's go play with the ducks!" Alejandro screamed and Elliott shook his legs so that Quinn could leave him free while Erick released Beth’s hand.

"Be careful!" Rachel screamed when the two started running but the twins were already far away and distracted by the other little friends.

"Your son totally has a crush on my daughter," Kurt said turning to her, Santana nodded.

"Totally." Beth and Quinn said in unison and Rachel looked at them surprised.

“But he is my-“ Rachel started to rumble but Quinn interrupted her.

"You are too apprehensive," Quinn told her, wrapping her arm around her waist and Rachel glared at her, forgetting everybody else.

"And you always make me play the bad cop," Rachel complained as she settled into her wife's arms.

"Have you seen your sons? They bribe me with the famous Berry pout, it’s your fault and I’ll never be able to win against the three of you." Quinn pointed out to her and then she kissed her.

"Quinn." Rachel said in a warning tone but smiling, leaving another kiss on her wife's lips.

"Rachel."

"Oh my God, get a room!"


End file.
